I was laying in the bed with an enormous head ache keeping me from sleeping so I decided just to get up and work on the blog. Before I go on I have learned one thing about blogging, I have no idea how to edit. Yesterday I was missing an "n" on a word and spent a good amount of time trying to figure it out. I then decided enough people had seen it so it didn't really matter any more so I gave up. Maybe I will learn how to edit, maybe not. It's a gamble.
I was thinking about today's theme of "Medical update". Since I really can't do to much by way of updating I thought I would share one of my, well, klutz attacks. Yeah, imagine me, a klutz attack. Shocking isn't it. No more than 50 in any given day. This particular one was in, I think, September of this year and involved my foot. Ah, you see a pattern here?
I had decided to give a diaper shower for my sweet daughter-in-law for their seventh child, my sweet, perfect, Natalie. They have three girlies in diapers so I thought, by way of suggestion of my other sweet daughter-in-law Hana, that a diaper shower would be a perfect idea. I live 2 1/2 hours away from Laura's house so it involved a trunk full of stuff and a few last minute things to purchase. My schedule was pretty tight once I got there to get the food put together and the site set up while six perfect angels asked questions and helped me out by nibbling on the goodies.
Daddy had to go out of town for work so it was Mom, me and the children making all the preparations, setting up and such. It wasn't the original plan but I have learned to go with the flow as much as I can. Laura, like all my children and in-law children tend to try to protect and take care of me so I try to work around all their overprotectiveness. This night was no exception. I had worked as quickly as I could (remember I am old and forget to factor that in to the equation) and did not get everything done that I had planned to in a timely fashion. I tried to figure a time line in my mind for the next day that would work but it just wouldn't come together so I had to go to the store that night. I knew if I mentioned that to Laura that would not fly. So, like a teenager I made my "sneak out of the house plan". I decided to wait until she went to her room to lay down then I would sneak out. Luckily she lays down early, heck who wouldn't with 7 children.
So I slip my flip flops on, I have a key to the house, I can be really quiet (if I try really hard even though Robin doesn't believe it) and I didn't turn the lights to the car on until I got out of the drive way. I zipped off to the store so proud of my little plan. I picked up the balloons, the extra plates and all the other things I needed and was so happy with myself. I cranked up the radio, I really thought I was getting away with it all. I never snuck out of the house when I was a teenager but man I was doing a great job of it as a 57 year old. Laura would NEVER KNOW!
I got back to the house and decided to park on the drive way instead of the grass because I really couldn't see where all the scooters were parked and I didn't want to accidently squish one. I pull up and open my door. I was so thrilled that it worked so well that I decided that I should load some of the decorations I had made with the kids to save time in the morning so I open the back door of the car and take off for the side door of the house but if forgot about the landscaping logs that are right at the edge of the garden. The garden that runs right at the edge of the drive way so as I rog which is a run/jog. When you are 57 and southern you cannot run and if you have boobs it is not advisable to jog so you sort of "rog". In the process of rogging past the landscaping logs I clip the stupid (of course it's stupid it's an inanimate object) thing with my left big toe hard enough to cause me to lose my balance. I nearly fall and so naturally I throw my right foot forward to catch myself only to kick the car door right where the upper and lower edges of the door come together nicely to a very pointy point! I hit it about an inch above the toe next to the pinky toe.
Now you have to know I have a VERY high tolerance for pain and I nearly passed out. I can't scream. My daughter-in-law thinks I am in the house. I can't make a sound, my son isn't home, there are 6 children sleeping and a pregnant woman protecting them. I can't walk the pain is so bad. I am now thinking this was the worst idea I have ever had in my life. I reel in pain wondering how I am going to get to the door before morning and if I even HAVE to get into the house before morning. I haven't closed the cursed car door yet because I may want to sleep in the car if I can pull myself up into it.
After what seems forever, I finally force myself to hobble up to the house and let myself in (you know I have been having a serious talk with myself the whole time I have been sitting on the ground rocking back and forth in pain right?), which I actually manage to do quietly. Laura sweetly comes through the kitchen after a while (where I have deposited myself and can get no further) and gets a drink and discusses how sweet it is that I am doing the shower for her. I am doing all I can not to cry and laugh at the same time. I got what I deserved for sneaking out of the house.
It ended up I did some nerve damage that took several weeks of wearing no shoe and only a sock in public for it to heal but it did heal. Currently I am waiting for the toenail on the left big toe to finish falling off and growing back. I wear a bandaid on it because I can't paint the thing and I don't like to have unpainted toenails.
Oh, and I did fess up to Laura though I never did tell her just how bad it was. It was BAAAAD.
That's why u always close the door...lol
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